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This is the archive for November 2006

An actual happy moment around these parts.

No sports right now. I'll give something later today.

Happy birthday to our own Stat Girl, Ms. Jade.

Ms. Jade's own birthday Jeter

However, while not the real man (even my Mexican skills aren't that great to get past the security he's got), here's the next best thing.

All of us here as Sports Bastards love you very much. Whoever doesn't agree, I'll personally beat the shit out of you.

So, happy birthday, Jade!

Thanksgiving Wishes from Ron to YOU! Yes, you!

Greetings, boys and girls.

On this, the most food-filled of all American holidays, we all have a lot to be thankful for. At least, I know I have a lot to genuinely be thankful for, so let me give it a shot. Maybe I can express this without sounding like a douchebag.

First and foremost, I'm thankful to everybody who reads this site, and who has read this website from the beginning. Without you, it'd just be me musing about sports in instant messages to Rich and Chris, and while they love me and how entertaining I constantly am, I'm sure they also like a break from me now and then. So thanks for reading SB, and tell your friends about us if you like what we're trying to do here. Tell two friends if you don't like us.

I'm thankful for the staff of great writers and funny motherfuckers we have here. Rich the workhorse, Jaime the sex appeal, Len the East Coast Bias, The Icon Chris Smith (AKA T.O.'s biggest fan), The Icemann (such a gay nickname) Luis, No Gimmicks Needed JK, Spinler, and anyone I've forgotten. You're all great, and you all need to write a whole lot more.

I'm thankful for our regular cast of commentators, especially those of you that hate me. Jade, The Critic, Halo, Guzzy, and anybody else who has ever dropped a little e-note on one of our posts.

Special thanks go out to all our affiliates and friends of the movement we're trying to do here, from Attu and Kissing Suzy Kolber to God Hates Cleveland Sports and Where Have You Gone, Marge Schott? You all kick ass, and I try to read you all every day. Well, except for Marge Schott, who haven't updated since late September. Still, great name.

Also, thanks to the NFL for a third football game on Thanksgiving! That'll give me the excuse I need to stay awake after 7 PM.

Now that I've spread a little love to you guys in the spirit of the season, I'm going to go pass out from an acute overdose of turkey and stuffing. Catch you guys in another 12 hours for another day full of football!

EDIT: A big FUCK YOU to Insight Cable for choosing not to carry the fucking Thursday night games on the NFL Network. Choke on my cock and die, you filty whores.

The Walking One & Spur-pacalypse Again.

On Tuesday night, the Hawks beat the Cavaliers in OT at the Q aka the Quicken Loans Arena. Atlanta's off to its best start in years and well, the Cavs are...hold on a second...this just in.

LeBron walked off the court before the final horn sounded. What? Nah. Not him. Maybe A.I., but not LeBron. No, really, this actually happened and here's the funny thing on top of a dozen funny things about this whole thing. First off, there's no way the Cavs should've lost this game. These are the Hawks, ladies and gentlemen. Dominique Wilkins and Mookie Blaylock aren't walking through that door, to put a Rick Pitinoish spin on things. A game before LeBron walked out [and who can blame him because after all, it was he who was scored on to send the thing to OT to begin with], the Bobcats shut him down in a loss on the road after they beat the Spurs in San Antonio. I guess I'd take a walk too with a whole FOURTEEN SECONDS LEFT in the game after losing to the HAWKS. Wow. Guess anyone's capable of quitting on their team, even if it's the newest in a long line of "Air Apparents". Now here's a little background about yours truly before I get into the meat of this, probably the single most enjoyable sports rant I've ever written. I'm 26 years old. When I first started watching basketball in the 80s, the Celts, Lakers and Pistons ran the land with the Bulls just starting to rise to power. Jordan was on the verge of greatness and well, things were great. Twenty years later, high schoolers and foreigners have all but taken over and the sport that was invented here, is being won by well...everyone else but us internationally speaking. About three years ago, while everyone debated on who would be better, Carmelo or LeBron, I took Carmelo. Probably one of a handful to do so, but as I told people, Carmelo's got that 'Franchise Player' intangible within him to put a franchise on his back and carry them to the top. To this point, he has proven that making the playoffs every year since he's been in the league. While yes, he made a cameo guest spot in a DVD that's not too 'PR friendly', he's never quit on his team. EVER. He's never walked out on them, even if that game was against the likes of the Trail Blazers when they were losing by 1 point with 3 seconds left. Great players do not quit on their team, they don't quit period. Carmelo, to his credit has been a real quiet 'great' to this point. He has yet to not average over 20 a game in a season and yet, because of how stacked the West is at his position, he hasn't made an All-Star appearance...yet. That will change this year, guaranteed barring injury. He hasn't been out of the first round...yet, but trust me, that will happen. In my mind, he deserved Rookie of the Year and should have won it over LeBron. Carmelo played more, played better and his team did great with him leading the way, as a real ROTY SHOULD DO. It took LeBron three years to finally make the playoffs. But...by default and because everyone's bowed before "The King" so to speak, he's able to get away with everything under the sun. So what, if anything do we take out of this experience if nothing else childrens? I thought you'd never ask...

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Just pretend it's the Pro Bowl and vote!

Tuesday, Nov. 7th is Election Day in the United States. Now, it's not a Presidental election year, so nobody really gives a shit, but I'm going to ask you all to do me a favor and vote.

Why vote, you ask? Simple! Your vote can do one of the following:

1. Get those damn Republicans out of office

2. Keep those damn Democrats out of office

3. Legalize pot

4. Get "The Stormin' Mormon" Todd Heap into the Pro Bowl

Vote however you'd like, I don't really care. Well, except about Todd Heap. That's one effective tight end who deserves our love (and a cornerstone of my fantasy football team).