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This is the archive for February 2007

Hey Bayless, fuck you!

This one goes directly to the Vanderbilt graduate cunt named John Edward "Skip" Bayless. The same man who said that the Tennessee fun only goes one way. He said that Pat Summitt wouldn't even pull off a stunt to equal what he called Bruce Pearl's "classless" stunt. Skip, do us a favor, sir: retire or kill yourself. After this picture, who says that you aren't going to Wal-Mart for your rope?

Eat it, Skip.

And to prove how quality Pat was, she even sang "Rocky Top". Oh, and the men's team also destroyed "The African Viking" Joakim Noah and his Florida Gators. I'm sure those sports fans at the hardware store will give you free items to end it all, Skipper...

Words cannot express the depths of my irrational hatred of Duke

Why, is that two losses in a row for the Duke Blue Devils at Cameron Memorial Indoor Stadium? I do believe it is. First Florida State University’s Semen Holes upend the dookies, and now it’s hated cross town rivals the University of North Carolina Tarheels who come into Duke’s House and fuck Duke’s mom.

I, for one, love it and wish to see it continue. Duke cannot possibly lose enough ass whippings, at home or on the road, to satisfy me. Like most dyed in the wool Kentucky Wildcats fans, I remember 1992 vivdly. Christian Laettner could cure cancer and give me a million dollars, and I’d still kick him in the junk.

I will have my revenge for Aminu Timberlake, Christian. Oh yes. When you least expect it, I'll stomp on your chest right back.

South Texas Death Ride.

Wow. Remember how everyone was absolutely certain that Greg Oden would be the impact player of the year for the Ohio State University men's basketball team? Remember how he was supposed to run away with all the awards, lead the Thad Five to a national championship, then go be the #1 draft pick in the NBA and save some hapless franchise?

Well, apparently, someone forgot to tell Kevin Durant that he's supposed to lie down and accept Carmelo status to Greg Oden's LeBron James, because he lost his ever-lovin' mind tonight. Durant poured in 37 points and grabbed an astounding 23 rebounds (he also had 3 steals) in Texas' 78-64 victory over Bobby Knight's Texas Tech Red Raiders. The manchild Oden managed only 9 points and 6 rebounds, along with two blocks, in tOSU's 78-60 victory over Purdue (a team nowhere in Texas Tech's league).

Before you begin, tOSU marks, I know. Oden's still not playing with both hands, blah blah blah, I don't fucking care. Kevin Durant has never been held to less than 10 points in his college career, and he's snagged 13 double-doubles in 21 games. Durant is, by turns, an unstoppable inside force and impossible to stop on the perimeter.

Oden's a great pure center, don't get me wrong, but he's Bill Russell, while Durant is something like a faster Kevin Garnett, if Garnett didn't mind mixing it up inside. You can throw bodies at Oden and get him in foul trouble, but Durant's either going to run around your big guys or run through your guards. Good luck trying to stop him.