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This is the archive for July 2008

Fantasy Football Time

With the new season due to start in just a few weeks, I hereby cordially invite you all to join my Fanstasy Football League, 'The Premiershit'.

You can register at

Once you have logged in and entered your team, click on the 'Leagues'
link you can find on the right of the page. Now enter the code
84045-96702 to join the private league.

Enjoy the game.

Who's The Wanker In The Black?

Recently, the world was marvelling at the antics of the Belarusian Drunk Referee. This wasn't the first time a football match official has made a fool of himself though, and here's a clip to prove it.

Sadly, it doesn't include the classic Graham Poll incident, but you can't have everything, can you?

Shaolin Soccer 2

Continuing what appears to be fast becoming a running theme here at Sportsbastards, here's a clip of China's Under-23 Olympic team and their 'friendly' against English side QPR, which quickly descended into chaos. There's even a few flying kicks in there for good measure.

It's ironic, perhaps, that as a QPR boot flies into an opponent player's face, the last thing he might see are three simple words: 'Made in China'.

Introducing 'Drunk Referee'

Belarus, in the depths of Eastern Europe, is a country famous for... er... not much really, apart from a being a bit too close to Chernobyl. However, it now has a new claim to fame, as home of the world's most inebriated match official, Sergei Shmolik. Here he is in all his glory, refereeing a Belarusian league game. Initially, it was thought he was suffering from back pain, but hospital tests revealed large amounts of alcohol in his body. To be fair, if I had to referee a Belarusian football match, I think I'd probably start taking crack.

Paid Slavery

Sepp Blatter, FIFA's official Idiot-in-chief, has once again put his foot in it, by announcing that Manchester United are treating Ronaldo like a slave, by refusing to sell him to Real Madrid. Seriously, what the hell has it got to do with him anyway? For a man with such huge responsibility, this seems deeply unprofessional to me. Also, how does paying someone thousands of pounds a week to kick a ball have anything in common with slavery? If it did, Kunta Kinte would have been shouting "Toby" in no time.

If anyone at FIFA is reading this, please, please, please sack this useless tub of shit, for the sanity of us all.