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Luther for UscuM coach?!!

As I'm reading my new ESPN Magazine with DA BEARS! on the cover, I'm reading The Jump. I see something strange in there. Luther Campbell making sense. Don't believe me. Get your copy. I'm going to put this up word for word.

How I'd fix the Hurricanes
By Luther Campbell, Rapper/Miami Fan

They need to give me Larry Coker's job. I'm sick of this. We've got five different running backs but nobody wants to be the guy. Our defense is fine but they're on the field too long. They're trying to protect and score points because the offense is terrible.

We used to walk around wearing swagger scarves. We used to hit people in the mouth. I'd bring the swagger back, but they don't want me near the team! Do they think I'm gonna tell the kids to shoot up a parking lot? The former players on the sideline are now busy networking, talking about stocks. Instead, I'd have Warren Sapp get in players faces after a bad play.

We've gone from National Champs to National Chumps because Coker allows the university board to order him around. I'd tell the administration, "I coach football. You run the school." Period.

They have no love for me, but I love Miami. When I die, I'll have a UM logo on my Casket. Put that in my will.

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What do you think? Make your own jokes in the comments.
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Comments

I never thought I'd say this, but... Luther Campbell makes a lot of sense.

...I feel so dirty now.

Posted by Ron at 10/18/06 01:33:42

Ya know, Luther does make a lot of sense and what's even more frightening about this is the fact that he once sung a song entitled "Pop That Pussy".

Ron, hurry up and activate me dangit, I
wanna rant on this. :P

Posted by at 10/19/06 16:04:08

Shit, I knew I forgot something.

Posted by Ron at 10/19/06 17:03:05

Shit, I knew I forgot something.

Posted by Ron at 10/19/06 17:03:09

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