Since everyone’s doing their introductions, and I didn’t do mine in the opening post of this bitch, my name is Ron. I’m from Louisville, Kentucky, and I devour sports like Paris Hilton devours cock or Kate Moss devours cocaine. I’m the guy in charge here, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to sit on my ass and let my talented crew of misfits do all the blogging. I lead by example.

I love UK basketball, college football in all shapes and forms, pro football in most of its shapes and forms, hockey, and even fucking soccer. However, my first love, my true love, my only relationship that matters is my relationship with boxing, but instead of rehasing Samuel Peter vs. James Toney, let’s talk football.

What better way to kick off SportsBastards.com than by discussing the first premier primetime game of the college football season between Bowden State Correctional Facility and the Miami (Fl.) University Drug Rehab Center. The U and FSU, two teams you love to hate if you're anything like me. I will say this, even though both programs stand for what's wrong with college sports, they sure do have a lot of talent between the two of them. I think either one of these teams could go out and hang 30 points on the San Francisco 49ers right now.

Well, from a pure physical talent standpoint, both these teams are impressive. However, apparently the FSU team has never played college football before. How else could you explain all the dumb personal fouls, the fumbled punt return that should've been a fair catch, the interceptions, and the lousy tackling? How about the fumbled snaps, the skipped balls, the tips?

Hell, even the officiating in this game has been pretty sloppy, considering they tried to review an unreviewable play. They let the punter get tackled at least twice in the second half, too, and that always draws a flag. Throw in the fucked-up finish to the third quarter, and this was a pretty poorly-officiated game. I guess it’s to be expected, since it’s the first game of the season, but you’d think it’d be the players who were nervous and rusty, not the officials.

However, as bad as the officials were, and as bad as FSU played in the first half and most of the third quarter, Miami played worse in the fourth quarter. All those three- and four-and-outs really fucked them over, because they were in control of the game going in at halftime. Kyle Wright, as good (and reckless… learn to slide!) as he was in the first half seemed to stiffen up in the second half. He was as nervous as a virgin auditioning for a porn film.

The best thing about this game, other than Jenkins’ spectacular tip-toe catch for the U and Buster Davis flying around the field like the second coming of Jevon Kearse for FSU was ESPN2’s coverage of the game. That Full Circle gimmick? Pretty damn fun, I must admit. And hell, you trade some commercials for actual analysis, which is the best part! Excellent. Toss in some anti-NBA jokes, a mention of ESPN8 (The Ocho), and I have a new way to watch big-time college football broadcasts.

Start the prime-time year off with a bang.