Buy Viagra
Skip to main content.

Assault Weapons Magazine's Man of the Year: Donna Shalala

In a desperate bid to save his job, Larry Coker is now apparently ordering his players to really thug it up and start upholding Miami’s proud tradition of brawls, shootouts, and rape. Unfortunately, this return to badassery starts with Miami players using guns, and sometimes there are consequences.

Bryan Pata was such a consequence, killed yesterday around 7:30 PM in a parking lot from gunshot wounds. As appropriate, Miami senior safety Brandon Meriweather returned fire, but in another failing of their university football program, failed to hit the guy that killed his teammate and friend. That’s just sad.

Three shots and no connections. At least when teammate DB Willie Cooper was shot in the butt, he and his posse managed to clip the fleeing SUV. Meriweather couldn’t hit anything.
Rich believes this is the University’s fault for not protecting its players, and I agree. So I have a solution that will keep Miami’s thugs safe and boost their reputation amongst the murder friendly rap community. Mandatory firearms training.

That’s right, gang, I went there.

These guys are going to have guns. Let’s be real. They do go to the U. Even more damning, most of them live in Miami itself, so they need those guns to protect themselves from Cubans, drug-dealers, and other UM football players. So if they have guns, they may as well know how to use them.

Nothing gives you less street cred than shooting yourself in the cock while trying to draw your automatic from the waistband of your stretchy football pants. It’s the only thing more embarrassing than shooting at someone who killed your friend and not getting sweet “Die Hard” revenge. Obviously these guys aren’t going to stay out of trouble, or situations where they can get into trouble (like I said, they’re dumb jocks at Miami), and they won’t go to the police or even the coaches to get a little protection.

It’s the only sensible solution. Besides, we might get lucky and someone will accidentally bust a cap in Donna Shalala’s empty skull. Booya!
There are currently no trackbacks for this item.
Use this TrackBack url to ping this item (right-click, copy link target). If your blog does not support Trackbacks you can manually add your trackback by using this form.


you are a fucking dumbass. first of all meriweather was not involved with Pata's death you dumb shit. He is Cooper's roommate and no, when he shot back at the person shooting his teammate he missed. you fucking idiot get your shit straight before you are going to talk about one of the best football programs in the country.

Posted by at 11/19/06 13:07:36 cheap ugg boots ugg classic tall ugg classic short ugg classic mini ugg classic cardy
http://www.canadagoosesdenm... canada goose danmark
http://www.canadagoosesdenm... canada goose expedition
http://www.canadagoosesdenm... canada goose citadel parka
http://www.canadagoosesdenm... kvinders canada goose expedition
http://www.canadagoosesdenm... kids canada goose
http://www.manoloblahniksho... manolo blahnik shoes
http://www.manoloblahniksho... manolo blahnik boots
http://www.manoloblahniksho... manolo blahnik pumps
http://www.manoloblahniksho... manolo blahnik sandals
http://www.manoloblahniksho... christian louboutin
http://www.designershoe4uk.... prada shoes uk
http://www.designershoe4uk.... prada american cup shoes
http://www.designershoe4uk.... prada low shoes
http://www.designershoe4uk.... prada high shoes
http://www.designershoe4uk.... prada leather shoes

Posted by at 12/13/11 05:36:23

Add Comment