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This is the archive for February 2008

Eduardo's Floppy Foot

Every time I see this injury, I'm in real danger of spraying the room with half-digested cornflakes, so I thought I'd share it with you (you can thank me later). However, the news that Arsenal's Brazilian-born Croatian striker Eduardo is going to be out for nine months got me thinking about what he could do during that period of recovery. Then I remembered how shit my team, Newcastle, are at the moment, and it suddenly made perfect sense. He should play up front for Newcastle. Even in a wheelchair he'd be better than the bunch of jokers we've got at the moment. While we're at it, we'll have Professor Stephen Hawkin in goal.

Winning Ways

England won a game! I've had a night's sleep since then, and I'm still feeling the shock. Even though I'd correctly predicted the 2-1 scoreline beforehand (and I really should have made a bet), I considered that to be optimistic at best. But 2-1 it was, and Fabio Capello's reign as England manager began with a victory. Even though he looks oddly like a science teacher from my secondary school called Miss Wheeldon (who I'm sure invented the whole butch dyke thing), I truly feel he's the manager to take us forward.

Firstly, he put Michael Owen on the bench, where he stayed for the entire match. Even though I'm a Newcastle supporter, I thought this was great, because he's been absolutely useless for ages. Now he's not an automatic choice for England's first team, he might actually put some effort in at the club that pays his, no doubt, ridiculous wages.

Secondly, he's let all the players know that reputation counts for nothing, and they'll have to earn their places in the team. This make a refreshing change from previous England managers, who talk about making changes, and then end up picking pretty much exactly the same players as their predecessor.

Fabio, I salute you.