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This is the archive for January 2009

Let's Play Head Coach Trivia

Alright, kids. This postseason has seen a hell of a lot of changes.

It seems like lots of fallout abound. So, here goes.

Denver - Josh McDaniels (Former Darth Belichick Sith Padawan)
NY Jets - Rex Ryan (Fomer Billick flunkie and Buddy Ryan's Twin son with the short hair)
Cleveland - Mangenius (Former Favre whipping boy, also was the Jets HC)
St. Louis - Steve Spagnuolo (I can almost hear Len crying from here. Former NY Jints DC)
Detroit Lions - Jim Schwartz (Former Titans DC, you fucks can have him)
Seattle - J. L. Mora/Jim Mora, Jr. (Son of Jim Mora, former Ookie handler, heir to the throne of mediocrity)

At large we have the following coaches still lucky to have a goddamn job.

Dallas - Wade Phillips (Son of Bum, butt of KSK jokes)
Kansas City - Herm Edwards (You play to lose the game...)
San Diego - Norv Turner (Somewhere Jaime Sue is crying in a corner with her bottle of Stoli)
Philly - Andy Reid (Frequent target for batteries, gourmet eater of bear claws)

And finally, the Jason Garrett might get this job team...

Tampa Bay - still vacant
Oakland - Just fucking name Cable the HC, Ra's AL Ghul...

So, who's a definite lock to still going to have a job...

Tennessee - Fishstache (C'mon, he's fucking retiring there...)
Buzzsaw - Ken Wisenhunt (Fat lady has sung on that losing streak, folks)
Steelers - Mike Tomlin (Smooth like Shaft, tough like Cowher)
Dolphins - Tony Sparano (WILDCAT!)

Hopefully this will help you figure out where your team stands. Any others to add, comments, please.

When It Rains, It Pours

The Carolina Panthers should be happy that it started raining towards the end of their humiliating loss at home to the Arizona Cardinals in the Divisional Round of the 2009 NFL Playoffs. The rain will be a nice cover-up for the tears that the Panthers players, personnel, and fans will undoubtedly shed as they sulk from defeat.
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