So, some retard was making threats about how there were going to be radiological “dirty bomb” attacks at several NFL stadia over the weekend. Specifically threatened were New York, Miami, Atlanta, Seattle, Houston, Oakland and Cleveland. Needless to say, the federal government, the NFL, and the individual stadium security teams have dismissed the truck-bomb threat as completely not credible, probably because of the points I’m about to go into below.

The most important issue, for me, is the loose interpretation of professional football that the poster is using. I mean, he did call the Dolphins, Texans, Raiders, and Browns professional football teams, so it’s not like he’s very smart. Can we really take someone that dumb at his threatening, poorly-typed word?

Read more, and get the bunk completely debunked.

Another interesting thought is that a radiological bomb would be any dirtier and/or more dangerous than the air in Cleveland, or just sitting in the stands in Oakland. Surely the concentrated B.O. fumes from the Black Hole would send any radiation running scared for the more pleasant-smelling confines of San Francisco. And how could blowing up a truck bomb outside of Atlanta and Houston’s enclosed stadia do much good in terms of spreading radioactive crapola over the 100some-odd thousand inside?

Don’t even get me started on the ineffectiveness of radioactive dispersal devices in rainy ass Seattle. Consider the fact that nuclear emissions are controlled by water-based storage systems to control the spread of fallout, then realize that it’s always raining in the Pacific Northwest. The only real danger is the explosion itself and the fact that people are generally idiots looking for an excuse to panic, which is why I doubt a radioactive dispersal device would scare many New Yorkers.

All you have to do to protect yourself in the event of a dirty bomb is to get out of the area as safely as possible, keep your fingers out of your eyes and mouth, don’t eat or drink anything that may be contaminated, cover any open wounds or clean them, put your contaminated clothes and jewelry in a garbage bag for later testing, and SHOWER. The natural enemy of radioactive isotopes is water, and soap can’t hurt things.

Get the facts before you freak the fuck out, people. Thank me later.