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No Hype Needed (NBA First Round Wrap-Up)

So the first round is in the books and well, we had a lot of shit go down that got me wanting to write. I think we saw a team collectively quit on its team at home (we saw that twice actually, one game led to tying the largest margin of victory in the postseason, the other was simply the end of one of the better teams this decade). In any event, allow yours truly to take you through each series as only I can (since the networks are too busy cramming their wet dreams down your throats)… Cleveland/Detroit- Well, I said if Detroit had nothing left in it, this wouldn’t be pretty. In fact, I said this would be a sweep if they didn’t show and damned if they didn’t show. Glad to know they call it HOCKEYTOWN for a reason. Go Wings.

Atlanta/Miami- In the end, I guess D-Wade wasn’t enough to overcome a collective team effort from the Hawks. Oh and I’m ready to give this team its props now. They sent D-Wade packing, something I don’t think would’ve happened if they kept Marion instead of sending him to Toronto for the corpse of Jermaine O’Neal. Marion could’ve kept tabs on Joe Johnson, who just went ballistic on the Heat. Johnson will be checked next series by LeBron. Do NOT rule out a possible upset if the Hawks can take one in Cleveland.

Orlando/Philly- If not for the fact that Orlando forgot the time tested concept of ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’, this series would’ve ended in 4. Instead, we got 6 and Courtney Lee may be done for the postseason. Pity, since Chicago didn’t knock out Boston and the C’s appear to be jacked up on Dew. Take note Orlando, giving up double digit leads against the C’s will send ye home for the Summer.

Chicago/Boston- Best. 1st Round. Series. EVER. In the end though, Chicago simply didn’t have enough to knock out the champs. Remember kids, you cannot draw the champ in a title fight. You MUST knock em’ out. Boston’s now got a series win under their belt and the confidence that even without KG, they can win in the playoffs. Oh and to all you Suns fans, I know it must hurt everytime Rondo does his thing like he did in this series. Averaging a TRIPLE DOUBLE?! Wow. Could’ve been a great understudy to Big Stevie Cool, but oh well.

LA/Utah- Utah was simply outgunned here by a hungrier, more powerful team. The Lakers however, need to figure out how to keep their foot on someone’s throat. This will cost them games as they go deeper into the playoffs, possibly even their hopes of winning title #4 this decade, first without The Big Aristotle.

Houston/Portland- Well, good news, bad news for Houston. Good news, you get the monkey off your back without T-Crap in uniform. (Perhaps a sign, but I won’t go all Oliver Stone and liken him to A-Rod or nothing.) The bad news for Houston, they will most likely get crushed by that gorilla sporting the Purple and Gold uniform that’s heading their way fast. Good news for Portland, they learned what playoff basketball looks like and will improve for next season. The pieces are in place for this team to make a legitimate run next season, ESPECIALLY if they can get an upgrade at point guard so this offense can flow during the playoffs. The bad news for the Association, if that point guard I alluded to is Steve Nash, the Trail Blazers will win the 2009-10 NBA Championship. I guarantee that. Kevin Pritchard is the best GM in the league, he will work the GMs, I mean phones manned by GMs to get the Blazers better next year.

San Antonio/Dallas- Wow. Just…wow. I think this was probably the biggest shocker of the first round to me personally. Turns out the weakest team in the West, wasn’t as weak as I thought. Carlisle is a very good coach and he outcoached Basketball Belichick (that’s my new name for Pops) in 5 games. Kidd is fortunate that the last real PG that can make him look his age is gone, but unfortunately for the Mavs, they’re facing a legitimate offensive powerhouse in Carmelo that will expose their lack of a defensive stopper. (Face facts, they still haven’t got a defensive stopper.) As for San Antonio, it’s their first real setback in about nine years. They aren’t done, in spite of everyone’s desire for them to just go away. They still have Parker, they still have Ginobili and Duncan’s still breathing. The Spurs need a big man down low that can take over and complement Timmy, which either Drew is or is not. I don’t know if half a season plus the postseason is enough to go on ya know? Window’s starting to close on the Spurs and they need to get a crew ready to push on with Parker once Duncan retires. If the Spurs manage to pick up Sheed (who has made no bones about wanting to play alongside his one time nemesis while he was at Chapel Hill), the Spurs will make noise next season. Big noise.

New Orleans/Denver- Just…unbelievable how the Hornets rolled over in this series. I really thought the Hornets could push the Nugs, but who would’ve thought they would just roll over and die the way they did? Management needs to take a serious look at this team, the coach and make some decisions. Because this city has been through far too much to have a basketball team playing this way going into next year. I’m not sure what the deal was, but this team clearly didn’t give two shits and it definitely showed in this series. Or perhaps the piss poor management decisions finally slowed this team to a grinding halt. As for the Nuggets, I think Billups was a GREAT acquisition for them. The return home for Big Shot Billups has and will pay big dividends for the Rich & Creamys.

Coming very shortly...a look at the second round.
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