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Handicapping The Race For Second.

Because at this point, if you all haven't figured out that New England's going to run away with this thing in the AFC...you're either a Steeler, Colt or Charger fan holding out hope where there is none or you're just a fool. On second thought, how about we say you're both and call it a day?
Let's break this down into its simplest terms, shall we? Here's why the Pats are going to win AFC crown #4 in 7 tries...

A) There's not a team in the AFC with the secondary that can hold them in check. Don't say Indy, because for a quarter and change INDOORS NO LESS, Brady torched them. Care to see what's going to happen outdoors in Peyton's "House of Pain" (remember, Peyton's never won a playoff game in Foxboro). You can cancel Blitzburgh, because as I've told any and everyone who will listen, any team that has a safety that keeps getting talked up, it's for a reason. It's because the rest of that secondary is more suspect than O.J. Simpson and Michael Vick combined.

Safeties don't cover receivers, they simply cover what the corners cannot
and if they're your last line of defense, it's generally a done deal. Just ask Anthony Smith who had to undergo the embarassment of being just flat out flamebroiled by an irate Pats squad last night.

B) You have to be mentally tough to beat New England. Nobody in the AFC is. Say what you will about Baltimore this season, but I think they were playing off of the fact that a fallen soldier (people seriously do not give this more credence or cred, but Da U is a very TIGHT knit unit.)... I think they were fired up to give it a go for that night only. *See last night's box score to see how far that carried them.* You can't go in with the thought process being these guys are going to cream us. The second they sense you're in doubt, you're out. That's it.

C) You have to play a perfect game for 60 minutes. 60. Not 59. Not 58.
SIXTY. If you give this offense a chance to win, they will. Ask Indy. Ask
Baltimore. People will say that New England showed weaknesses in those
close games and well, I say they're full of shit. If you're in a fight with someone who's peppering you with punches, but you're landing a few of your own...it doesn't mean they've got glaring weaknesses that you got to...it just means you got in a few good shots. Doesn't mean shit if you get knocked unconcious and don't remember how you got to the hospital.
If Philly, Baltimore or Indy won those "close games", that'd be a totally different story. But they didn't. And the truth of the matter is people, the Pats are locked, loaded and ready for war. They're furious with the league for making them into a team that can't get by without cheating and they're infuriated that their titles have been questioned.

I have no doubts that the Pats will go for the juggular this Sunday due to Mangini's snitch job that started all of this and oh yeah, don't think next Sunday will be any different as they'll go for broke against the winless Fins as a way of sticking it to the 72 'Fins who won't STFU. The Pats will call you Mercury when they've brought the wrecking ball to the home where you and the rest of your old timers have incessantly drunk up like alkies everytime the last unbeaten team falls every year. These Pats are done being nice and simply put, I'm likening this to when Triple H went from being all nice to becoming The Game we know him as now. The hammer's being dropped people and the body count will continue to rise. As Trips himself would say...Game Over. But law states we must play a Super Bowl, even if the representative that
is going stands a snowball's chance in the coldest part of hell of winning.
So I'm going to handicap this "race" for second place...

Dallas- Has all but wrapped up homefield advantage and on paper, looks primed for a February rematch with the Pats. Only one thing has me just
a little bit nervous about picking them. Wade Phillips. I know this is an easily forgotten thing, but he hasn't fared very well in the postseason. Music City Miracle anyone? I mean, it's one thing to lose in the playoffs. But to have your season ended on a SPECIAL TEAMS PLAY, that's the stuff that coaching follies are made of and Super Bowls aren't WON on.

Green Bay- Honestly, I'm pulling for them because the thought of a Brady vs. Favre SB would probably be the greatest QB matchup in the modern era. Bigger than Montana/Marino or Montana/Elway and honestly, I'm of the thinking a Favre/Brady SB would be just what Iron Hand Goodell is looking for from a "ratings" standpoint. Their running game is better than it's given credit for and they're guaranteed at the least, one home game and a week to chillax. If Brett can exorcise his personal demons about Texas Stadium, the Bay's going back to the Bowl.

Seattle- Honestly, I trust them to give me a Triple Latte sooner than I do them making a legitimate run to the Bowl. They won their division all but by default and damn near blew that in the process. On top of that, I refuse to take any team seriously that loses to the Browns. I'm serious, you can't be a Super Bowl contender losing to the Browns...unless of course you're in the NFC.

Tampa Bay- If the Bucs win the division, I say Chucky wins Coach of the Year even ahead of Mike McCarthy who has done an exceptional job in Green Bay this year. Why? Simple. Aside from Cadillac Williams, who's presently impounded for the rest of the year with injury and Jeff Garcia, who's on the bench hurt as well...they're looking better than they did even when they won their lone Super Bowl in team history a few years ago. People are starting to remember that Gruden can still coach and he has himself a very nice young nucleus to build upon for the future. A true darkhorse, but I see a one and done here.

New York- If you think I'm going about face on the 'Can Coughlin' thing, you're wrong. Yeah, they've won a couple of games and all that, but this team shouldn't be having to win three road games to get to a Super Bowl.
And honestly, that's the only thing that will get me to openly recant it all.
A Super Bowl. Coughlin does that, I'll post an apology right here stating how wrong I was. But I don't worry about that. They'll get there, they'll be humiliated and odds are he'll get another extension just cause Reese is a friggin' mo-mo (moron to the second power).

So ultimately, I think it'll come down to Green Bay & Dallas in Dallas and it is here that Favre will show Tony Romeo (runner-up for Mack of the Year behind Brady if rumors of him and Jessica can be confirmed, sorry Tony but Tom's got Gisele and three rings to your Jessica and zilch) how it's truly done. Green Bay's going to get healthier with the week off and I think they'll find a way to beat Dallas.

Then they'll be put down like Old Yeller in the Super Bowl by Cujo Brady and the rest of the Pats.
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Comments

Len, I TOLD you to stay off the Patriots' bandwagon. Last thing we Pats fans want is your kiss of death getting in our way. Go do the Dolphins a favor and root for them. :p

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I think Jade detests/hates the 'fruit flies' (the bandwagon fans) of the current prevailing teams......fuckin' run Len, run......

P.S. - By the way Jade..., did you ever get that new tattoo of your rabbit? I seen the contest rules, and I'm an artist, but I never got around to sending/submitting you anything. Well anyway, I hope you got branded good -- ha-ha!

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