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Rambling, Just Cause L Can.

Alright, so here's my real comeback column. I've been gone due to some real craptastic conditions and the like (not worth going into here, but if you're wondering where the extra vitriolic venom's coming from that's it), but I am back as evident by my annual NBA preview making the usual rounds it makes. Anyway, I initially was going to go with an anti-Ohio rant on all of its teams just cause I was really pissy, but I changed my mind. In its place, I'm just gonna touch on a few things at random just cause I can.
Starting with...

Playoffs?! We're Still Ranting About Playoffs?! Playoffs?!
- For ten years now, just three simple letters have thrown college football fans into a tizzy. B. C. S. Bullshit Championship Series. Buckeyes Can't Sleep, whatever your acronym of choice is for the letters, one thing is sure to follow. Controversy. This year, it started early even before the polls were released. "The Buckeyes dropped out of the Top Ten after losing to USC, but USC only fell eight spots after losing to Oregon State!"
Ahem. Few things to note Ohio Slapnuts, also known as Buckeye fans.

1) The Trojans lost by 5 on the road, the Buckeyes were BLOWN OUT by THIRTY FUCKING TWO POINTS!!!
2) The Buckeyes have blown it twice in two straight national title games.
3) The Trojans have only lost ONE national title game since the BCS's inception of said title game.

If I were a betting man, which program would I want to see compete for a national title? A team that has won one and shared another or a team that's becoming the Notre Dame of the Big Ten (credit goes to Z88 for coming up with that doozy and for the uninitated, it speaks to ND's inability to win bowl games)? I said before the start of the college season that the winner of the USC/O-State game would face the survivor of the mega brawl that is the SEC. I'm inclined to stick with it, since I'm not believing that Texas will survive the gauntlet it has to go through in the Big XII nor do I think Alabama will escape the remaining part of its schedule. It's not beyond the realm of possibility that the survivor of the Cocktail Party (which was Florida for anyone stuck in a time flux and wasn't aware) and USC could lock up for the National Title. Texas as good as they have been since its win over OU, in my mind, has a stacked schedule on its way towards its first national title since Vince Young was QB. Oh, speaking of Vince...

The Titans Are NOT What We Thought They Would Be Without Vince...
- As if it wasn't bad enough that Vince's understudy at Texas has them on the verge of a national title push, on top of a Heisman that he himself did not win...Vince's understudy in Tennessee has the Titans undefeated and thinking Super Bowl for the first time in close to a decade. Oh, by the by, did I mention Vince's understudy for the Titans is KERRY COLLINS?! Okay, follow me here...

- They sent Adam Jones to Oakland Southeast aka Dallas for a song. Or at least one less strip club incident anyway.
- Their season was supposed to be over when Vince had his breakdown after a bad game.
- They're in the same division as Peyton and the Colts, which is supposed to be instant death for any team.

But as luck would have it...

- Sending Adam Jones away has seemingly lifted a huge cloud off of the Titans.
- Vince's breakdown has actually paved the way for a QB who can actually play and doesn't care if he's being booed by a stadium full of people. He's not bad enough to lose the game for ya, but he's not exactly capable of winning it for ya either. Oh and as it turns out, Kerry's comeback has sparked the Titans' previously unthinkable rise.
- Guess the Colts might be on the decline after all. Peyton's making throws he normally wouldn't make, age is taking its toll on Marvin and the lack of defense for the Colts is starting to show its true colors.

On top of that, having Tom Brady go down for the year took the Patriots out of serious running for another AFC Championship. So Rich and the rest of you Titanmaniacs out there, while 16-0 is highly unlikely, a trip to the Super Bowl isn't out of the question. Tennessee is still a tough place to win a playoff game and if they manage to lock up homefield throughout, I'm really hard pressed to find a team in the AFC that can go into Ten-a-kee and beat the Titans. The Steelers are iffy due to their inability to stay healthy and the uncertainty around Big Ben taking one shot too many in the pocket. After that, it's a virtual toss up. Literally.
Here's A Story...Of A QB Named Brady...
- As if it's not enough for the Buckeyes to change QBs after a horrible loss, the Browns have resumed their tradition of playing Musical QBs after a two year absence. Just one year after decreeing that Derek Anderson (DA around these parts, but Kelly Holcomb 1.5 if you ask me) was the man and sending Charlie Frye to Seattle after Week 2, it only took about a day and pocket lint to demote him after a choke job against the Ravens in Cleveland. I mean, can we really put it all on DA, err KH 1.4 for blowing a 14 point second half lead? (No, the answer to that one will have his pink slip handed to him after their loss to Blitzburgh next month.)

So after trading away an opportunity to have drafted Felix Jones (who the Cowboys took with the 22nd pick this past April, which would've been the Browns' selection), we'll finally get to see what QB Quinn, Medicine Man can do. I believe he's essentially got the rest of the year to show what he can do, not just for the fans, but for whomever the new head honcho will be. (If you're a Browns fan, you should be in front of the Browns HQ singing 'All I Want For Christmas Is Cowher's Chiseled Jaw'.) Alright, for those of you who are keeping tabs, that brings our Ohio QB Shuffle count to 3.

Buckeyes- Terrell Pryor in place of Todd Boeckman
Bengals- Ryan Fitzpatrick in place of the "injured" Carson Palmer
Browns- Brady Quinn in place of Kelly Holcomb 1.1 (Damn rating's dropping faster than a stripper's panties.)

Elite No More...
- Another one bites the dust. The UFC remains the only real MMA show in town, after Elite XC folded last month. I won't get into the money aspect of things, but lemme make this short and to the point. When a promotion's money attraction is knocked on his ass in less than the time it takes for a Pop Tart to be finished in a toaster...yeah. Case closed. Kimbo Slice is just who Dana White thought he was, pretty much what everyone thought after that James Thompson fiasco in which the referee bailed him out. I guess Petru-whatshisname decided to take matters into his flailing hands and bypass all of that drama.

Oh and Gina Carano can make me tap any night of the week, several times on Saturday. (That was my evil, perverse remark of the day.)

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