Old School Indeed.
Bill Simmons, I couldn't have put it better myself. This week, I've had to endure with a lot of medi...no, let me start this over.
Growing up, there have been two legitimate constants that I have loved almost without fail. Basketball and wrestling. This week, I've seen low points in both that have me flat out loathing both on a grand scale. In wrestling, in the latest attempt to get people talking about it as if necrophilia and old women birthing hands wasn't enough, we got a lame car bomb and a phoney "who killed Vince McMahon" angle.
In basketball, we've got the Cleveland Cavaliers passing themselves off as the best team in the Eastern Conference. So in light of the recent mediocrity that's befallen both, I felt compelled to put thought down on paper while I of all things...work. In terms of wrestling, well, I guess it's a lot like basketball in a lot of ways. They're pushing some guy to the moon that the people clearly don't like in John Cena. Almost similar to how they're pushing "Prince" James the same way. Only over the long haul, he'll find that "push" will meet a resounding thud in his quest to win titles. Those aren't handed to you on a silver platter, Prince, you've got to earn those. Still, this Finals series has been brutal in every sense of the word. The last time I saw a mismatch this bad was back in 2002, when the Lakers manhandled the Nets in four rather repugnant games. Not that the Nets didn't deserve to be there, because they did. They were the best team in that conference and I have the Slam Magazine cover with them on the cover to prove it. However, they ran into the best two man act in NBA history in Shaq and Kobe which well... weren't gonna be denied at all. In this case, LeBron's every foible, every weakness is being exploited for the world to see. The Cavs as a team is having their every achilles put on mega blast by the Spurs and simply put, every last word I've said about the Cavs to this point has been validated in full. The Cavs are NOT title worthy. Hell, I'd be hard pressed to simulate the Cavs to this point in NBA Live 07 unless I put a souped up version of myself on the team and that would probably be the ONLY WAY Cleveland's beating these Spurs in a game.
It's funny how quickly both wrestling and basketball have all but become afterthoughts to me.
Ever since Jordan retired in 1998 and Stern basically changed the game beyond all recognition, it hasn't been the same since. There are no more teams built around big bruisers like the X-Man and Anthony Mason. No more 48 minutes of bruising ball up and down the floor, none of that.
Just like with wrestling, shows aren't geared around great storylines backed up by really great wrestling. Rivalries like The Rock & Austin, HHH & The Rock, etc, etc have been swapped for Cena squashes such and such, or Cena topples big dummy nobody gives two craps about. Oh and for the record, if I ever meet ANYONE who admits to buying a PPV with Cena/Khali as the headliner in person, I'm kicking em' square in the jaw. That's just flat out reprehensible. Anyway, as a fan of both, I feel robbed because of how watered down the product's been. Thanks to Stern and his rule changes, not to mention rigging of the lottery, the Cavs basically got a free pass into the Finals. Thanks to the rule changes, it's virtually impossible to slow down LBJ meaning we'll see more of his ho-hum dunks that are on par with Cena's "Five Moves Of Doom". Oh wait, the Spurs did. My bad.
So yeah, if the world were equitable, I wouldn't have to hear J.R. sounding like he's about to have a seizure everytime Cena comes out or Lawler lamingly saying..."The Champ Is Here" which I've all but equated to everytime I hear the words "King James" uttered about LeCrock. For someone's "big coming out party", me thinks someone forgot to inform LeBron, because he didn't show up. Going 10-30 in a make or break game for your team, isn't "showing up". Turning the ball over as often as he did in critical junctures, isn't showing up. Fact is, with the chips in the middle of the table and the money on the wood...LeBron showed he's like Jordan in number ONLY. That's it. LeBron, you've seen what a true dynasty looks like. You've seen what it takes to get a ring on your finger. So now the question about San Antonio's "dynasty status" comes into question. Personally, I think it's as laughable as LBJ's status as a "great player" in the NBA. The Spurs have won 4 titles in 9 years. 4 in 9. So what if none of them were back to back? Duncan's still the only other big name star that's appeared in the Finals other than Shaq in the last nine years, does that not make him the best PF of all time? And so what if these guys are as exciting as watching paint dry?
When I think of all the great wrestlers (not personalities, but flat out wrestlers) that didn't get to win that one brass ring, it makes me a fan of the Spurs more and more. So yeah, I put them in the same class with the Celts of the 80s, because guess what? Even if there's two years between their last three titles, they're still titles people. Pops is the best coach in the league today (yeah, he's getting the nod over Big Chief Triangle, who's besmirching his reputation by coaching a mediocre Laker team just for a buck he doesn't need) and the Spurs are the Patriots of the league. PERIOD. So bow down to the champs and say hi to the newest members of the Dynasty Club, currently occupied by the 90s Bulls, 80s Celtics, Lakers and Pistons along with the Showtime 2K Lakers.
And big ups to Tony Parker for not just winning the Finals MVP, but getting to marry Eva in a month. He is the Len Jersey Mackadocious Pimp Of The Month.
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