Buy Viagra
Skip to main content.

Barry The Snitch And Da Game Of The...Postseason.

Gonna start this one out with my thoughts on Barry The Snitch Bitch Bonds, because after what he has just pulled, it'd be remiss of me not to unload on this roided freak with both barrels.

First off, let me start out by saying that there's a reason that no other team in the majors other than the San Fran Midgets signed this clown in the offseason. Damn great reason at that. He's a cancer in the locker room that actually carries the distinction of making T.O. seem like one of the coolest cats on the planet by comparison. I mean, say what you will about T.O., but even HE wouldn't stoop as low as this spinally challenged bastard did. Fails a test for amphetamines and even though he's not going to be hit with any punishment. Thanks to Bud Idiot and that strict policy of MLB. He still has enough heart to say he got the smoking gun from Mark Sweeney's locker. Uh...yeah.

We'll believe that about as quickly as we will believe that George Dummy Bush's plan to send over 20,000 more troops will bring about a quick resolution in the War on Drugs...err Oil, err, Terrorism (may as well be the War on Drugs, there's not a victory to be seen for miles and miles). But anyway, I will say this about Bonds. Even IF he breaks the home run record this season or next, he shouldn't be allowed into Cooperstown.

I mean, it's painfully obvious that much like with Big Roided Mac, Bonds hasn't exactly been clean (not Clear, but clean mind you) during his pursuit of the mark. If I gave you two pictures of Bonds, one picture from his days in Pittsburgh where he practically resembled my current frame ,and I'll give another picture of him in San Fran where he all but inflated to gigantic proportions, I'm daring someone to tell me that's not 'roids flare-up. I'm daring someone to tell me that he's been knocking balls into the Bay on natural power alone.

My main point being, if they can keep Pete Rose out for doing nothing other than gambling on baseball and lying about it [Which he confessed to at long last and for that, he should be commended.]while being Baseball's All Time Hit King...why should they let in a Snitch who tried to throw his teammate on the tracks in front of the Bullet Train and a guy who basically pulled the biggest "Next question..." before Drew Rosenhaus did. Only McRoid did it in front of Congress. But enough about this, time to talk football.
As I said a few days ago (I think), the Super Bowl will be played this weekend in San Diego. It'll be the Bolts sporting their best record in franchise history against the one team which could spoil not just their year, but end Marty's tenure in the Electrical Power Plant to boot with an L. Now, in most instances, having a 14-2 mark and the MVP/Offensive Player Of The Year would be more than enough to guarantee a man his job. A loss in the playoffs while tragic and totally unforseen, wouldn't be cause for the GM to print up a pink slip with Marty's name all over it. However, when there's as much piss and vinegar between the coach and GM the way it has been with A.J. Smith and Marty Mart, this would be the case.

Oh and in most instances, when you're talking about a 14-2 team hosting its first playoff game off of a bye, they'd be the favorites in MOST INSTANCES. But when the team that's coming into town has arguably the best coach and QB combo in all of football, well, you can understand
why the Chargers organization went as far as freezing out any and ALL potential Pats fans trying to buy tickets to this Sunday's game. The Patriots are to this decade, what the Cowboys were in the 90s, the Niners were in the 80s and the Steelers were in the 70s. Domination Incarnate.

The Pats hadn't lost a playoff game since Belichick and Brady took the respective reigns until a year ago in Denver, when Brady was well...Un-Bradylike in defeat. However, even with the departure of Deion Branch half way through this past season, the Pats have still managed to look like their usual title winning selves. Brady's still finding receivers and like great QBs do, making something out of a lot of nothing. So, what hope do the Bolts have of having at least one more home game before they possibly book a flight to Miami?

They've got LT, which is as great a weapon as there is to have in the backfield and on the opposite side of the ball, they've got Mister Merriman who flies the way Lawrence Taylor used to. The fact of the matter is, even with those two things in their favor on top of a stadium which will be jam packed with thousands upon thousands of Bolt fanatics...there's still two very prevalent reasons why the Bolts might have their season ended on Sunday afternoon.

1) Bill Belichick is still the head coach and even though coaches don't win games, their gameplanning does. Marty's proven time and time again with the chips on the table, he has a very repugnant tendency to fold up shop. Oh and if he's just barely getting over nightmares of what Elway did to him in two straight meetings in Cleveland during the 80s, he'd best be prepared for the Best QB In The Game Period in the form of...

2) Tom Brady. Nothing short of a relentless pass rush and Brady spending most of his day looking up at the lights, will spare Marty an upset that...for all intents and purposes wouldn't be an "upset" when you look at the specifics here. Brady's the best QB in the game because right now, he's got three more rings on his finger than any and I do mean ANY other QB.

The closest guy to him is Brett Favre who has a grand total of...1. Oh and that Big Ben fella. But Brady, much like HBK in wrestling, won't let you outperform him on a big stage. So all of that said and the numbers aside, at least the numbers that won't mean a thing come kick off, here's what matters...

Phillip Rivers is playing his first playoff game and he happens to do so against one of the best defensive minds [if not THE BEST] in the NFL. Marty's got probably his best shot at making a Super Bowl run, but standing in his path are the three time champs who are conceivably three games away from getting their 4th title in 6 years.

Well, let's be technical here. They're two wins away because whomever the NFC sends, will be folded up and packaged quicker than you can say beep five times in a 30 second span.

Fact is, regardless of where this game is, Brady and Belichick are pissed. They have had to hear everyone writing them off all year long and this is the time when they start showing folks emphatically that as long as Bill's wearing the fashion faux paus sweatshirts and Brady's still Brady, there's not a team around that will beat them after the calendar hits January.

And IF this does happen as I'm believing it will, which would contradict what I previously picked earlier this year in the way of Baltimore winning it all again, this would be their most impressive one to date. Brady wouldn't
have had the weapons he had in previous years, some kid named Gostkowski would be kicking their major points that Vinatieri would be knocking through blindfolded and their defense wouldn't be what it was. Damn impressive if ya think about it, is it not?

Don't get me wrong, the underdog in me wants to see Marty hoist that trophy and stick to the Brownie faithful here, thus proving my point about the state of Ohio being a Sports Black Hole. But in the end, I can't shake this sneaking feeling that Belichick will expose young Phillip the exact way he did young Benny two years ago en route to a title.

I can't shake this feeling that the Pats will cook up a protection scheme that keeps Brady on his feet and able to pick apart a secondary that quite simply, I don't think is as great as everyone thinks it is. Pats win...and Marty more than likely is gone, even though he doesn't deserve to be.
There are currently no trackbacks for this item.
Use this TrackBack url to ping this item (right-click, copy link target). If your blog does not support Trackbacks you can manually add your trackback by using this form.


No comments yet

Add Comment